Free tickets

We won free movie tickets yesterday.

There was this truck parked in school yestersay. Two guys approached us on our way to class. They said:

"Hey look, we're giving free stuff."

There were free movie tickets, entrance tickets to Bar Celona, some clubbing CD, and Twilight caps.

So we filled up forms, thinking we could just take and leave.

But NO.

So we stayed and answered a few easy questions.

"What is the name of the newspaper we're advertising?"

"Emm, Today."

"Full name."

"You mean my full name? Tham Szehui."

"No. The full name of the newspaper."

"Oh.. *look around* Malaysian Today."

I saw Anne laughing.

Fine, man. Awkward moments.

I miss my high school friends.

I like pleasant looking guys.

林峰 is one of them.

Aaah he look so good in Master of Taichi!

Love Can Wait

Pa says, "It's time to pray for your spouse."

Pastor says, "Pray, and God will give him to you."

And so I made a list of what I want in him. And I kept on adding in. Now it has about 15 items. I realised that I could be really picky.

I laughed, and told God to take His time.

Nevermind, love can wait.

Fit for Fat

I dreamt that my sister told me:

"You're so fat. Your pants is literally bursting."

And I woke up, my legs feeling as if they do not belong to my body.

The day before I accepted my father's challenge and ran for 5km to prove to him that I am fit.

My most frequent visited website of the week:

www.bnm.gov.my

I must say, that I'm so drained.

Comm Banking major assignment, Interlearns, and Financial Management mid term test all due on the same day, which is one week away.

在学校常常会遇到怨鬼，所以看到时要大喊：

“时运高！睇我唔到！”

And I Kissed Them Two By Two

I taught kids at Sunday School to sing the New Testament Song. They don't call it the New Testament Song, they call it The Matthew Mark Luke John Song.

And so aunties like to put me in trouble. They say, "Ooh, those of you who could remember the first two stanzas without looking at the slide, che che Szehui will give you something special."

I was like, Shit.

And so I said, "I will give each of you a kiss."

And so I continued, "To show that I am very serious in kissing all of you, I shall set my mouth apart for one week until I see you next Sunday."

And so I concluded, "I will not brush my teeth for one week, eat lotsa onions, garlics, grilled sotongs, and kiss you all."

Kids took a few steps back. Aunties gave me The Look.

One little boy looked at me. "Really?" He asked.

I think he's in love with me.

And So I Sued My Mom

I want to sue my mother for discrimination.

For eveything I did that displeases her, she says:

"You single eye-lided and left handed people are always up to no good!"

There's this really funny post I read from FMyLife.

"Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML"

Shit. I can't stop laughing.

Weird Dreams

Weird Dream#1

I dreamt that all my eye lashes fell out. But I was not worried. In fact I was quite happy.

So I told Ma, "Ma, I've got no lashes now. So I need mascaras."

"But where do you wanna apply the mascaras on? You've got no lashes."

I was like, "Yeah, nevermind. Falsies then."

"But you've got no lashes. Where do you wanna clip your falsies on?"

=.="

Weird Dream#2

I dreamt that I was fighting with Enemy No.1.

I attempted a side kick. It turned out really embarassing because my kick was as low as my knee.

Enemy No.1 laughed really loud.

I was embarassed, and then turned angry.

I charged at Enemy No.1, pushed him down, sat on him and clawed his face.

Punched Enemy No.1's face. Not hard enough.

Punched Enemy No.1's face again. Not loud enough.

Punched Enemy No.1's face again. Not accurate enough.

And I punched and punched and punched until I get the perfect punch.

Weird Dream#3

I dreamt I dated Rafael Nadal, who is freaking hot.

And Girls Wanna Get Married

And there is the one and only way to really piss Anne Yap Shiang Ling off.

Wear a white dress on her wedding day.

One day I told Tsiyin:

"Let me be your emcee on your wedding day."

"No. I don't want you to go up there and say weird things."

Oh yeess, I will...

And So I Played Pranks

1. There was this very nice aunty who came to our house.

She looked at me, "What form are you in?"

"Form 3."

"Ooh, having PMR soon! Are you prepared?"

"Yeah sorta. But I'm really worried about my Geography."

"Haiyah! Don't worry! You're still young there's so much more to expect! When you're in your Form 4 and 5 then you'll think PMR is nothing."

"Ooo..." (laughing really hard on the inside...)

"What school are you attending?"

"SMK Seksyen 1 Bandar Kinrara."

Then Ma came and ask, "What time are you going to Uni tomorrow?"

"7.30am."

Aunty was confused, "Uni?"

Ma glared at me, "She's nineteen, Lillian."

2. Once, at a family gathering where it was so large we were seated with people we don't really know.

There was this aunty who asked me, "Dear, what form are you in?"

"Aunty, I'm doing my first year."

"Oh oh oh, which Uni?"

"MU."

"Oh oh oh MU! Your father graduated there!"

"Yes yes yes..."

"What programme are you doing?"

"Bachelor of Psychology and Business."

"Oh! I didn't know that now they offer such courses! Good good good! Study hard!"

"Monash University does."

Phone Almost Lost

I almost lost my phone one day.

When I realised it was not with me, I told Anne to call my number. Heard no ringing.

Went to the washroom. Not there.

Went to the library. Asked the librarian. He was so shocked. It's a phone I've misplaced. I cracked a smile, it's just an old koyaked phone no worries. Alas! Not there.

And I found it. It was in my bag. Blur.

I was thinking, maybe if I've lost it. I could have got a new phone plus a new number. Yeesss.

It's that wry smile, turn head around as if distracted for that split second, and turn back giving them your attention.

Body language says: I don't give a damn of what you're saying gfys.