Posted by
SH
Posted by
SH
Posted by
SH
(Mom wants this)
(Sis wants this)
Posted by
SH
Once upon a time, there was a maiden whose brows so long and lustrous that fishes drown and the birds crash like faulty planes. And yet this maiden has an untold secret to the exquisite charm of her eye brows, that she should not deform them in any way, be it threading or tweezing, and that she should not consume carbonated drinks. This maiden had friends of two, one whose name rhymes with the word “Ant”, and another was nicknamed “She ran” because she was always running around.
And there was one fateful event that the company of three attended a banquet celebrating the joyous occasion of winning a game of Snake & Ladders. The maiden whose brows are so beautiful was so contented of winning the board game that she began to misbehave, where she gulped a mouthful of carbonated Coke and began to blabber. And so she revealed to her friends that she should not deform her brows in any way. “My brows are virgins. I am not supposed to do anything to them or they will lose their magic.” she said. Now, the maiden whose brows are so long was indeed an arrogant and conceited lass, where she was so proud of her eye brows that she often intimidate other damsels by boasts and brags of how many chaps has she charmed by the slightest brush of her brows.
Now the two friends where one’s name rhymes with the word “Ant” and another nicknamed “She ran” plotted against the maiden whose brows are so beautiful that herbivores eat meat. They threw her into a caravan and sold her off an evil king, claiming that the maiden whose brows so glossy could weave strands of gold into straw. “Let me out! What are you to do with me?” the maiden shouted. “You will be sent off to the King He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named and your brows shall be devirginised!” the two friends burst out in laughter. “No! No! No!” the maiden pleaded but her pleas fell on deaf ears.
So the poor lass sat helpless until she was brought before the king. King He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named was a big brawny man, with narrow eyes and a wide smile that crawls from the sides of his mouth to his ears like lizards. He peered through his tiny black pupils at the maiden whose brows then has grown to the length of the hem of her dress. “So I heard that you can weave gold into straw. You are going to make me rich!” the king laughed to himself and walked from the throne to the steps. The maiden then noticed that the king had feet so small and a built so corpulent that as he walks, he looked as if he was going to trip and fall. “No. I have been framed. I can’t weave gold into straw. You have to let me go!” the maiden pleaded. “Hah, do you think I was going to believe your teeny lies? Throw her into the tower filled with gold threads!” the king laughed to himself again, wobbled back to the throne and sat with a heavy thud.
And so the maiden was thrown into a tower filled with golden threads and the king cautioned her that if she did not weave gold into straw before dawn, he will have her head chopped off. The maiden was ultimately aggravated because she genuinely did not know how to weave gold into straw. Feeling feeble and helpless, she sat and weep, tears soaking her long, lustrous brows. A few moments later she heard someone calling, “Rabrowsel, Rabrowsel, let down your brows!” The maiden whose brows so long that the hairless grew hair peek out the window, and saw Brad Pott. “Rabrowsel! Let down your brows so I can see your face.” he shouted from below. And so the maiden let down her brows and Brad Pott climbed up her long brows. Yet Brad Pott was too heavy hence he fell and the long long brows were torn into ugly pieces. Brad Pott fell, bruised his buttocks, swore at the maiden, and then later married Angelina Jelly.
The maiden whose brows so long and lustrous was devastated for she thought she would escape, however it seems that her only hope was crushed. Just then, there was the sound of a ring of a metal bell, and the maiden looked up to see where the sound came from. A small, beardy old man appeared from nowhere and danced gleefully in front of her eyes. “Who are you?” she asked. “My name you don’t have to know, but straw I can weave into gold.” The small man sang. The maiden rolled her eyes, “The king wants me to weave gold into straw.” “Oh, for rhyming’s sake! But anyhow, I could also weave gold into straw.” The small old man grinned. “Good. Would you please do me a favour and weave the room of gold into straw?” the maiden requested. “Why, yes, but what do you have for exchange? You know, provide consideration.” The small man said. The maiden thought hard, “Well, I had a piece of pizza left from last night. But I have took a bite though.” And she took out a stale piece of Hawaiian Delight from her pocket. “Deal.” The little man took the piece of pizza and started off with work. He whistled and weave, turning gold into straw. And yet he whistled too much to the extent that the maiden had to stop him because the urge to relieve herself were intensifying with the whistling.
Posted by
SH
